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Helping you transform self-sabotage, shame and fear into sparkling confidence for a soul-satisfied life
coaching with Deah Curry PhD, cpc
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Self-sabotage can be defined as the thoughts, feelings, and choices that work against our true best interest. It can be behavior or beliefs you've learned in childhood that were intended to keep you safe, but now is operating to undermine your highest good.
Or it can be choices you make to get a short term benefit that end up costing more in the long run. Or feelings you talk yourself into that stem from an untrue or unrealistic perception of reality or possibility.
1. Being addicted to struggle -- doing things the hard way because of guilt or habit, when doing them the easier way is just as effective.
2. Believing change is too hard or inconvenient -- being reluctant to make time for new efforts in a busy schedule.
3. Giving up too easily -- one setback and you convince yourself you can't succeed, or that it's not worth it.
4. Waiting too late to start -- then not having enough time to bother, and making excuses for not following through.
5. Worrying too much -- about what others will think of you, or whether they will like the change you make.
6. Secretly wanting out of a bad situation -- using self- sabotage to help you do what you can't assertively do because you have trouble speaking up for yourself.
7. Rationalizing or exaggerating reality -- because you have a strong need to avoid anger, resentment, shame or guilt.
8. Clinging to illusions -- that things will change on their own if you just let them be.
9. Giving in to distracters and detractors – rather than having a clear vision of what you want, and a committed belief in achieving it, so that nothing and no one gets in your way.
10. Putting yourself last – falling prey to the idea that you must take care of everyone else, and everything before you deserve to work towards what you want in your own life.
11. Comparing yourself with others – lettings others’ successes intimidate you or telling yourself that they had more advantages, better education, greater wealth from the start.
12. Predicting the past – believing what you got before is what you’ll get again, rather that using experience as useful feedback to change your approach.
13. Focusing on the negatives – dwelling only on what you don’t have, can’t do, aren’t able to create, instead of looking for options of possibility.
14. Pining for purpose instead of acting for a purpose – waiting to figure out what you are supposed to be doing, instead of seeing needs all around you and plunging in.
15. Not keeping a schedule or consistent routine -- letting the day get away from you, or filling it up with unimportant trivia that does not contribute to your goals, or the betterment of your family, friends, or community.
16. Participating in or generating drama -- blowing things out of proportion, taking things personally, perpetuating stories that aren't true, getting all bent out of shape by some imagined insult to your pride, or making a big deal about feeling offended that someone else's choices somehow impact you when they don't.
Want to stop sabotaging yourself and start living from your empowered center? Schedule a free 20 minute consult now and we'll talk about how you can
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NEW!! Creating Sanity is an easy to read ebook with practical exercises and tips that will stop self sabotage from making you insane. Available for Kindle or Kindle reader app for your phone, PC or Mac.